Afternoon Consults
by xxmaybe
Summary: [Untitled House Series] If Wilson's afternoon consult experience is anything to go by then for once House is actually willing to offer his services as a consult, even if they are imposed.


**Afternoon Consults.**

Wilson pulled his pager from his pocket as it started to beep, "Sorry I've got to run."

"What for?"

"Consult."

"It's the middle of the second half, you can't miss this! What could possibly be more important than _this_?"

"Oh I don't know, the life of a patient maybe?"

"Send Foreman."

"Hey." Foreman protested.

"Ok, then Chase."

"I'm going." Wilson said pointedly as he stood from his seat.

"You'd rather miss the world series for a consult?"

"I'll be back."

…

"Pretty long consult?" House said once Wilson returned almost an hour later. Everyone had long gone, leaving House alone in his office with his soaps.

He shrugged, "Difficult diagnosis."

"You missed the game."

"I'll catch the re-runs tonight."

House, unconvinced, eyed his friend suspiciously. The wide unmistakable grin was enough of an answer for him.

"You've just had sex."

"Excuse me?"

"You didn't really go off for a consult, you went for sex. _You_ just had a booty call."

The smirk he was trying desperately to hide wouldn't leave his face, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"I can't believe this."

"Believe what? That I went and gave a consult?"

"What was the patients name?"

Wilson shrugged, "I don't know. Didn't ask."

"Ok then, who was the doctor?"

"I, err–"

"Admit it, you got a booty call you sly dog!"

Wilson buried his face in his hands, "I swear if you say anything to Meg I'll make sure there's nothing standing between the two of you. She's less than impressed that you seem to know the in's and out's of our sex life already."

House stood from his seat, "You're an open book Wilson. You're too easy."

"What? Where are you going?"

House paused at the door, "Going to conduct a little experiment."

…

House burst into occupied examination room with little warning, if none at all.

"You called?"

Meredith looked away from examining her patient, only to roll her eyes when she saw House get comfortable on the vacant stool opposite.

"No, I didn't."

He leant forward, "You called for a _consult_."

Meredith rested her hip against the examining table; her teenage patient looked between the two doctors in bemusement, not entirely sure _what_ he'd found himself in the middle of.

"_No_, I did not."

"Dammit! It worked for Wilson, why not me?"

Meredith turned back to her patient and started to feel his glands, "Forget it, it's not happening Greg."

House paused as what she'd said sunk in, "What! How did you know Wilson got a booty call at work?!" He exclaimed.

Meredith apologised to her patient, "Excuse him."

"Err, it's ok." The teenager stuttered.

"Come on, how do you know?"

Meredith rolled her eyes again as she turned once more to face House, "Maybe something to do with that stupid grin that hasn't left Wilson's face all afternoon." She shrugged. "That and Meg told me."

"She told you?" He gawked, but soon regained his composure. "To be a fly on the wall for that conversation." He pondered.

"I hear you man."

Meredith turned back to her patient and raised a weary eyebrow, "Hmm." She pulled her prescription pad from her pocket and scribbled out a prescription. "Take this out there, two a day for the next week and you'll be fine."

House held out his hand, "You giving them out now? Is it my turn?"

She dropped the pad back into her coat pocket, "Dispensary's closed sorry."

"You're no fun, especially after I wrote _you_ a prescription."

"You wrote me a prescription for estrogen when you thought I was getting too testy last week over a diagnosis. A diagnosis _you_ actually wanted to consult _me_ on."

"I was worried, you _were_ acting a little aggressively for a woman."

Meredith glared at him, "For a guy who was trying to get into my pants all of five minutes ago you're really going about it the wrong way."

"So you will?"

Before Meredith could respond there was a knock at the door, and the duty nurse stuck her head through.

"Doctor Flack, you're next patient is ready."

"Send them in."

"What about me?"

Meredith held the door open for the woman she was due to see next, "I guess we'll never know now."


End file.
